A student in a psychology class interviewed me over a year ago for a project. One of her questions was, "Do you have any recurring dreams?" I have had the same recurring dream off and on since 1997. That was the beginning of my senior year of high school and it's probably when I really started taking my studies seriously. My dream was that I overslept through an important test, forgot to go to school, didn't realize we were having a test, or the school calling to let me know that they've reviewed my records and it turns out I didn't graduate after all. This last scenario was specific to undergrad and grad school. During my last semester as an undergrad at Southern my adviser told me that a 5-credit Spanish course I took counted toward HOPE but not graduation. I had to take my case to the Dean and he approved my hours and I was able to graduate. I haven't had any of these dreams in the past couple months but I have been desperately trying to get my Media Specialist certification paperwork finalized through PSC (professional standards commission). I completed my coursework last July and Jeff and I took a vacation to Hawaii to celebrate our one year anniversary and the fact that I was done with school. So, I got this email yesterday...
You need the SPED. I just talked with PSC. I'm not sure why Dr. **** didn't have you take this course. SPED 6130 is online with us or if you can find another it will work.
I have to go back to school. I wasn't done after all. I took all the classes specified by my adviser but I do not qualify for certification if I have not taken a special education course. Observe the following definition...
Self-fulfilling prophecies--any positive or negative expectation about circumstances, events, or people that my affect a person's behavior toward them in a manner that causes those expectations to be fulfilled.
Did I bring this on myself with years and years of bad dreams, fear, and self-doubt? I'm feeling pretty down in the dumps. I'm still determined to reach my goal, but I'm in the throes of a spectacular pity party right now.
1 comment:
Do not think this way. None of this was your fault. Accept the stupid fact that Shit happens and press on. It is the only way to carry on. You are allowed to be mad and wallow for a while, but then head out and beat the idiots at their own game. Believe me as a mother if I could fix all my children's life problems I would.
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